[i] LoveLife

On Frenchies.

Photos by Brian Johnson of Lucky Girl Photography.

I've always had big dogs but when our Boxer needed a pal - we opted for something smaller and a little more manageable.That's when we got Norman (the second photo). When our Boxer passed away and my heart was cracked in half - we got Frank (the top photo). With a duo of French Bulldogs in our midst - it sort of feels like we have enough experience with them to officially crown them: awesome.

French Bulldogs are sweet + fun. They are far from "little dogs". They are far from dainty. And they are far from subtle. Just to clarify - I'm speaking about OUR French Bulldogs and I'm not sure that ours follow the breed standard as closely as they should.

NOISE. They make a LOT OF NOISE, but they rarely bark. They snore. They snort. They grunt. And Norman tends to sing when he wants to be let in. If you don't like noise (particularily the really intense man-sized snoring) then these pups might not be for you. NOTE: Frank snores much, much less than Norman, but Norman is INTENSE. He is so loud we sometimes have to put him in the other room if we want to watch a movie. He's LOUD.

EXERCISE. Compared to our Boxer - these guys are pretty low mainteance on the exercise scale. They like short walks and a few minutes of off leash time. They like to wrestle in the back yard. They chase things like kids and butterflies and reflected lights. AND THEN THEY COLLAPSE INTO A PANTING HEAP. Too much exercise does OUR Frenchies in.

KIDS. Most of the breeders told us that these guys would not be great with kids. OURS ARE FANTASTIC WITH KIDS and that is good news because we have kids. This is where French Bulldogs have really impressed me. They are small enough to be kid-sized and non-threatening but heavy enough to be kid-TOUGH and inviting. Norman is especially great with the girls and puts up with a lot of man-handling. And by puts up with I mean basks in the attention. Frank is great, too but we keep our hawk eyes on that guy with the girls because he's still a bit of a puppy knob. NOTE: our Frenchies are svelte, but giant-sized. The breed should be 20-25 lbs. Norman weighs in at 36lbs and Frank is 33lbs.

OTHER DOGS. Good and pretty good. I can see where the term "bully" comes from. Frenchies are friendly and intense and blantantly in other dog's faces. And snorting. And huffing. And begging to play. And being generally annoying so they (OURS) are on the receiving end of many well-earned warning growls. NOTE: Frenchies (OURS) turn into drooling monsters when they are playing with other dogs. Drool. 

INDOORS. They are thick, round, heavy, couch potatoes with funny smiles. They are unique personalities + sweet buggers. THEY LOVE BATHS. They are really nice, low-maintenance dogs that mesh well with our family. Easy to travel with. Easy to live with.

I like 'em. (In case you were wondering.)

Today: I'm struggling to finish my newest polar bear painting. Every time I get it just about done - I go and do something silly and set myself back a bit. I'd LOVE to get it done today. That would bring me a nice sense of peace so I am going to push my day towards that. Gentle intention. With coffee.

GO!

May Bulletin Board

May has been about adjusting my attitude and bringing things back to centre. And keeping my focus. And staying on task. And silencing the outside (and inside) voices that make noise that's hard to think through. Enough is enough. I have been hiding out in my studio and that's exactly where I am meant to be.

The photo of the dogs in the top right corner are Norman + Frank as taken by the fabulous Brian Johnson of Lucky Girl Photography. LOVE.

Today: It's a girl tribe day and hopefully the sun got the message. SHINE.

GO!

ONE.

Happy birthday, dog. Frank is the youngest member of our family and he just turned one. Which means he has been kicking around these parts for a significant amount of time... Year one for a French Bulldog is a funny time. They are very much like jolly old people who are hard of hearing and forgetful. 

Frank is a busy-body with several projects on the go at any one time. Right now he is digging three very enourmous + ingenious holes in the backyard that we refer to as toddler traps. He is just closing the door (I frickin' HOPE!) on his 12 month phase of chewing baseboards, stools, cupboards, walls, decks, bikes, doors, playhouses, garden tools, kids toys, trees, extension cords, potted plants, fashionable shoes, and last but not least - Poet, Norman, Penn and Pilot! What makes this destructive behaviour sort of sweet & endearing is the fact that he will do all of those things while looking you in the eyes. He is not ashamed of these vices. And he has no problem trotting by with your shoes in his mouth while giving you a wave.

But, seriously. He's been a good puppy. SUPER easy to potty train. Super easy. Happy. Semi-likeable. He is better than a vaccuum and cuter, too. He's kind of a mix between a baby seal, a pig, and a cat. He might be the ONLY frenchie I have ever met that doesn't snore! Oh, he's got a bit of a jumping problem but he makes up for it by being cuddly. French Bulldogs are a fun breed to have in your family and we love them.

Today we celebrate Frank - the little puppy we found in the classified ads, born two thousand miles away - but destined to help us fill the crack in our hearts.

Good dog, Frankie. Good dog.

*

Today: painting, painting, painting. I need to line up some coffee + tunes so I can get my latest canvas signed. Fingers crossed for productivity.

GO!

Beers, bears + bellies.

Quick post because I'm on a mission and don't dare slow the bus.

Today: I have three projects on the go. One is a beer. One is a bear. And one is a belly. The belly is mine and it involves planking and some serious Pilates work. The bear is a painting that I want to finish today. And the beer is another one of those projects I can't talk about BUT IT'S VERY COOL. Hey - I can't even drink beer. But I can drink coffee!

(Follow me on Instagram for the progress and sneak peeks! I'm @kalbarteski)

GO!

The trifecta of learning.

I have a physio therapist that I have been seeing for some back trouble... but really - she's done three times as much work on my heart as any muscle that needed treating. Yesterday when she left our session she turned around humbled me in the nicest way I and it did me good.

In the course of a few seconds she brought me to my knees with one cliché filled sentence. She said, "If you're doing your best then rest when your tired and don't beat yourself up." Done. Just like that. (The 'rest when you're weary.' is a Ralph Marston quote.)

Thought I'd share the words that put me in a better frame heading into the weekend and the long back stretch of 2012.

Today: is a slow painting day with lots of slow, rhythmic blues playing in my worn out, paint-stained headphones. I have a painting to finish and he's so dreamy I'm taking the scenic route just so I can spend more time with him. Love that. Happy weekending.

GO!

Slipstreaming.

I am changing how I do things. Here, there and everywhere. Some people might call it streamlining. I call it slipstreaming. Because that sounds so romantic - like a floating down a river in an inner tube. I'm slipstreaming because I need more time to paint. To love this life. To do what fuels me, to love the people I need to, and to rest when I have to.

The ideal trifecta, right?

Online: I took the 21 blogs I like to read every day and cut that to 3. I deleted the online newspapers and unsubscribed to emails that I was tired of deleting daily (like the GAP!). I paused a bit before doing this because I thought: what if I miss something? What if I hurt someones feelings? What if Gap has a killer sale? What if I get left behind? So what. I am tired of photos of macaroons and glitter painted nails. And triangles. And anything else that is annoying. I'm tired. I'm tired of spending too much time living other peoples lives and feeling strangely inadequate. I'm tired of the endlessly revolving ad machine.

In home: Mega PURGE. First, the clothes. Second the toys. Third the furniture. I have this dream that I will fill the walls with paintings and have perfectly styled rooms. I won't. And I vow not to sweat it. But I will fix broken things and make lists - room by room. OH I am a rockstar at working the timer features on the washing machine, dryer, slow cooker and oven (together with an assortment of really annoying iphone reminders so I remember) and it is GAME ON. Anything to add to the slipstream.

In bellies: I am eating without gluten, dairy, eggs and a couple of other things... but I'm the only one in the house that needs to do that. So, I'm working on an easy meal plan and schedule to take the pressure off preparing foods we can all enjoy so that I am less stressed when the girls are melting down and we have nothing for dinner that I can eat. This will be the hardest for me, but I am committed.

I think these three changes will change us. That's totally my hopefulness talking.

Slipstreaming, I love you already AND the photos at the top of the post are from my Instagram feed. I'm not reading as many blogs and it might seem quiet here... but I am an posting paintings, progress shots and peeks into our slipstreaming life. @kalbarteski

Today: it's a girl tribe day and we are off to fill the grocery part of our ideal trifecta. I hope it will be goodness. Like coffee.

GO!

Long weekend reminders...

Long weekends are good for a few very important things:

First, dinner parties. They are very, very good for rounding people up and getting hearts together for good laughs. It was so fun we did it twice!

Second, ice cream. In February I found out that I am allergic to dairy (along with gluten, bananas, pineapples and eggs). Those facts never bothered me until ice cream season. I bought an ice cream maker and my world has tripled in size! I made easy coconut + almond milk ice cream and felt happiness in my mouth! (I also indulged in whipped cream and was rudely reminded why I am avoiding dairy. Booo.)

Third, kite flying. I haven't flown a kite in a long time. Decades. But, we ventured out and found a secluded, windy, and dog-friendly place to adore the strong prairie breeze as a family unit. Even the dogs! It was worth it to be in the moment with Dan and the girls and the pups. So much fun.

Fourth, breathing room. Painting is a solitary adventure. I like that part. It gives me room to think. To breathe. And sometimes it gives me room to OVER think. The long weekend was a break enough to look back and see that 2012 has been too slow, too fast, too hard and too easy. It's been change in the making and that has been hard - and awesome. And heartbreaking. And liberating. And excrutiating. And terrifying. And all of those kinds of things. It's May and I'm not painfree and I don't have any real answers... I might never have those things.

But, I think 'being fierce' just might be forging ahead without needing those things...

If you're still reading this blog - through all of the complaining and whining and uncertainty. I truly thank you. It means so much to me.

Today: Appointments, painting and a little crazy adventure for me and Penn. Who knows - maybe 2012 will turn out to be the best year yet and greatness is just through this rough patch. Thanks Queen Victoria - for the long weekend reminders. ;)

GO!

On the wings of magic.

The winning moment for me yesterday was watching Poet come face to face with a butterfly. She found it in the porch. And while her big sisters sort of fluttered around with nervous excitement - that brave little Poet walked over and as gently as a whisper picked up the monarch and held it in her hand. The girls jumped around freaking out and to be honest - I fully expected her to stuff the poor bug in her mouth.

But she didn't. She just stared at it with those big amazing eyes of hers. And then she gently put him down and went about her way. Nodding to herself and patting her belly.

Her big sisters were as impressed as I was. We stared at each other without our identically coloured hazel wide eyes. It was like being witness to magic. I was so proud. Pilot and Penn were flat-out amazed. Penn instantly proclaimed Poet to be the queen of the fairies and trotted off to get her a crown. And as much as Pilot wanted the title - it's hard to argue with a moment like that.

What a gift that kid is.
What a moment to be present.
What a reminder.

Today: I have a special painting just waiting to be finished. And more to start. And believe it or not - I have more script work to do. I feel like I'm two-timing the blog, but I've signed a bunch of non-disclosure agreements and can't talk about the other work here. Or show pictures. Or I will be sent to a Brazillian jail to carve coconuts. It's not nearly as exciting as those last sentences sound. But, I'll go with it. I need a lot of coffee after a bunch of rough nights with sick kids and a husband away for work. And I am still wishing for a 2012 miracle.

(PS. If you're reading this: Happy 37th Birthday Tammy!) ;)

GO!

Here and NOW.

I did a good job yesterday. I was in the moment. I was present + mindful. With my girls. With my friends. Even in the carwash. Even when the girls were playing happily with their friends. I read magazines and left my phone on the table. On Silent.

And it was such a beautiful day.

Today: I'm creating a paint-sandwich. That means I will paint in the morning and the late afternoon, but the middle will be other kinds of goodness. Like munchies. And hearts.

GO!

Surrounded.

My studio is just right. Oh sure, I used to dream of a NY loft with towering windows and exposed brick, but compared to some of the places I have spent a great deal of time painting in - this is a small dream. It's 700 square feet of space with south, west, and north facing windows. It's just a short flight of stairs from my bedroom and the windows look out into a canopy of one hundred year old elm trees. I've got a sweet sink, two massive storage closets and enough floor space to work in several different corners at once. OH, and there's really horrendous carpet that's glued right down to the nice pine plank flooring underneath (eep!). But one day I'm going to find the strength to rip that sucker up and paint the floor (or maybe Dan will do that for me????).

But even better than all of that - my small people are close enough that I can hear them laughing.

I am living my dream.

AND, I am surrounding myself with art. It feels cathartic.

Today: it's a girl tribe day. I started a painting on Monday and I find it incredibly hard to break away from. I am obsessive like that when I'm in a groove with a canvas and I'm trying to do better. It's tough sometimes. I don't like to break for anything - not even to eat. BUT, that's challenging with small people. My humble goal today is staying in the now + being in the moment with these hearts that are growing too fast. And painting tonight when they have been tucked and are sweetly sleeping. ;) Coffee please!

GO!